By Charles B. Inlander

Welcome to the Savvy Caregiver column! In this column, Charles will offer suggestions, advice, and wisdom to help you be a savvy caregiver.

Communicating with your loved ones’ doctor, or doctors, may be difficult. Quite often, the person being cared for is not able to communicate effectively with their physician and it’s up to you to communicate all needs.

Sometimes, due to advanced age or disability, the patient is forgetful and may not remember what the doctor instructed or advised. Many caregivers are not sure exactly what their rights are when it comes to communicating with the doctors caring for their loved one or friend.

Communicating with the doctor is not as difficult as it seems. If you follow the guidelines I suggest below, the relationship between the doctor and caregiver can be a smooth and helpful one.

Savvy Tips for Communicating With Doctors

Assuming that the person being cared for needs help at the office and/or interacting with their doctor, it’s important that you (and possibly other family members) gently explain to your loved one that you are going to help with all medical issues such as accompanying your loved one to appointments, being in the examining room him or her, and asking questions and discussing other issues with the doctor on his or her behalf.

It’s also important to inform the doctor and his or her staff that you will be with your loved one during all visits. As long as your loved one says it’s ok, you have a right to be in the examining room, ask questions, and, if you have legal power of medical attorney (we’ll discuss this in later columns), make medical decisions.

Of course, in this day and age, doctors are busier than ever.

Here are some tips for getting the most from every visit:

• Write down all your questions before you go. Tell the doctor as soon as you and your loved one arrive for the appointment that you have a list of questions that need to be answered before you leave. Doctors appreciate this organized approach to a visit.
  
• Create a list of all the medications your loved one is taking. Since your loved one may have multiple doctors, each doctor may not be aware of other prescriptions or treatment.
  
• Make sure the doctor speaks directly to your loved one, even if you ask the questions or are the one who must follow instructions. Too often, doctors ignore the patient in a situation where the caregiver is also in the room. Doctors may assume that your loved one does not understand what is being said, which may make your loved one nervous or even angry. Remember, the patient (your loved one) is the patient and the caregiver (you) is the caregiver. The doctor should speak to the patient unless he or she cannot understand what is being said.
  
• Ask your doctor to speak slowly. If you are not clear about what the doctor is saying or prescribing, ask him or her to explain it again. Ask him or her to write down specific instructions for you to follow. Don’t be rushed. Remember you are responsible for the care once you leave the office.
  
• Ask the doctor for the best times of day to call his or her office if you want to speak with him or her directly. Most doctors have specific times they respond to calls. Agree that unless it is an emergency, you will call at those times.

By following these easy tips, the relationship between the doctor and caregiver will become a working partnership for the best interests of everyone.