By Nicole Levison

Since caregiving is one of your most important responsibilities, it is worth discussing with your employer. Hopefully your boss will try to work with you by allowing you to change your schedule, telecommute, take advantage of flex time, or job share. Caregivers in the United States now total 54 million strong. That’s a hard number for employers to ignore. Many companies offer counseling and other educational programs to assist with such intense life challenges. According to FamilyCareGiving101.org: one in five adults in the U.S. are considered caregivers, and 62 percent of working caregivers have to rearrange their job situations.

Your Boss Has a Heart Too

Many caregivers run into on-the-job problems because they are simply too scared to have a heart-to-heart with their boss. Ilene, an accountant from New Orleans and a caregiver of 12 years, says that when she finally told her boss about her caregiving duties, she was surprised to discover that her employer respected her all the more for her dedication. She said, “The company went out of its way to provide comfort and even offer financial aid when times were particularly tough.”

Think of it this way, if your employer doesn’t know that you are coming in late or leaving early because you spend your nights caretaking your elderly mother, he or she may assume that you just don’t care about your job, or that you are not professionally motivated. YOU, as a caregiver, need the security of your job even more while caring for someone else. Sit down and explain to your boss that while you enjoy you work, and you are fully dedicated, you’re tired and overwhelmed. Chances are, your boss wants to help you. Your boss hired you for a reason and he or she needs you as much as you need them. Explain that you need help—and you may find it. 

Your boss may have great suggestions on flexible hours—or arranging that you work one day a week at home. You can use that day to run errands for your loved one, schedule all your doctor appointments—and more.

When the Boss Doesn’t Care

In a shiny, happy world, all bosses will go out of their way to help you help them. But some bosses, quite frankly, may not care.

If you are laid off, demoted, fired, or quite simply passed over for a promotion because you take off time or make phone calls to doctors at your desk—take heart and take the time to:

• Contemplate the situation. The old cliché “Everything happens for a reason” may be true! If you do get fired or laid off, it WILL be stressful. But you’re a caregiver—you’ve been through it all! Job hunting might be challenging, but it is better to deal with short-term anxiety and fear of the unknown than to commit valuable time and energy to a company that does not support the pressures of caregiving.
• Reevaluate your goals. Life is too short to feel sorry for yourself—you know this more than anyone. Now is the ultimate time in your life to reevaluate your finances, career, relationships, your own health—everything. Your perspective changes when you spend your time caring for someone with special needs. Striking a balance between one’s own needs and real-life demands like providing for a family are complex enough before adding caregiving into the mix.
• Reach out to others. Being a caregiver opens up a whole new community of support, and if you put yourself out there and share your situation, chances are you will open the heart of someone who can help you, whether it be to find another job or point you towards helpful resources. Online support groups can help you share your feelings anonymously with other people in your shoes—or similar shoes.
• Learn from your experience. Your unique situation offers you knowledge that not everyone has. Is there a way you can creatively take what you have learned from this life experience and apply it towards a job opportunity that would be more satisfying? Some caregivers have found a new career by offering counseling and job coaching support to others. Caregivers are often the best multi-taskers and the most efficient people. Help others with your expertise! 

• Understand the law. Lastly, although an employer cannot technically fire, lay off, or in any way discriminate against a worker due to a medical condition or handicap, those rules do not necessarily protect a caregiver whose devotion and lack of energy may interfere with his/her work performance and abilities. Some laws, such as The Family Medical Leave Act protect caregivers by offering up to 12 months of unpaid leave to care for an immediate family member (spouse, child, or parent) with a serious health condition.

Get Involved

If we caregivers pool our efforts and resources, we can make headway in how governments and employers view caregiving. Whether you transport a friend to the hospital for regular appointments, take mom grocery shopping and clean her house, or help your disabled child prepare for each day, you enrich someone’s quality of life and understand the importance of being a caregiver.

Joining an organization such as National Family Caregivers Association, Family Caregiver Alliance, or National Alliance for Caregiving, can help you receive support and services.

Laws & Legislation

In America, legislation is constantly being introduced to Congress in order to ease some of the burdens of caregiving and educate a nation on the value of this often thankless mission; you can view these (and all) proposed bills online. Despite the fact that most caregivers do not have much time left over at the end of each day, you absolutely can make a difference by actively contacting those who can instigate change, such as your state senator and representatives.

And, if you don’t hear this enough: thank you for caring enough to do all that you do every day. As Diana, Princess of Wales, said, “Every one of us needs to show how much we care for each other and, in the process, care for ourselves.”