By Vicki Rackner, M.D.

One of the important ways to support your loved one is to ensure he or she receives the best medical care possible. As a caregiver, you are in the position to act as your loved one’s patient advocate.

You, Your Loved One, and Your Healthcare Professional = A Great Team

Once, at a conference where I spoke about working with your doctor, an elderly man in a wheelchair raised his frail, trembling hand and asked, “How do I know whether my doctor is giving me good care?  My doctor treated my cough for months. One day, another doctor saw me because my doctor was away.  She asked me some questions, listened to my lungs, and reviewed my chart.  Then she recommended a different medicine. My cough cleared up in two days!”

His story released an avalanche of stories from other audience members. One person said, “I had suffered from a painful medical condition for years. Then one day a friend told me about a new medical procedure. I suggested it to my doctor, and it worked like magic.  Shouldn’t my doctor be suggesting these procedures to me instead of the other way around?” Another woman spoke with remorse, “My son died several years ago.  Sometimes I wonder if there was more that could have been done.”

These stories remind us that a “patient advocate” is a critical component of the healthcare team. Since a caregiver is generally a person on the “inside,” they might be in a better position to know and understand the needs of a loved one. As a caregiver, you are therefore in a great position to be a patient advocate. While a caregiver may not have a medical or healthcare background, his or her day-to-day experiences with a loved one can yield critical information. Your healthcare professional may rely on this information in order to make the best medical decisions.

Keep in mind that being a patient advocate is not an adversarial position. It doesn’t necessarily mean rushing out and getting a second opinion on every matter, or conducting your own research and confronting a healthcare professional with your findings.

Becoming a patient advocate does not mean putting on the boxing gloves and going a few rounds with your loved one’s doctor; rather it means putting on a team jersey and saying, “I want to be a member of this team.” 

This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t seek second opinions, or do your own research. On the contrary, this is often a wise approach. If you do decide to do your own research or obtain a second opinion, you should speak with your doctor about it. Doing this may strengthen your relationship. Remember, effective patient advocates do not breed discontent.  They build and strengthen relationships.

Ask the Right Questions and Receive Better Care

As I see it, the doctor is there to offer answers. Your job as a patient advocate is to ask the right questions.

Some of the most important questions to ask your loved one’s doctor include:

“How do we know that this is my loved one’s diagnosis?” 

A medical diagnosis is a label that has special importance. Sometimes the labels are wrong.  In fact, up to 30% of patients who get their original diagnosis by a first doctor are found to have a different diagnosis by a “second opinion” doctor. No matter how long your loved one has carried the diagnosis label, be open to the possibility that the label may change. 

“Is the treatment moving my loved one towards their health goals?”

Like the man in my lecture who wanted to eliminate his cough, your loved one may have specific treatment goals. Be willing to ask the doctor questions about whether the current treatment is moving your loved one closer to his or her goals.

“Are there new treatments that we might consider?”

Each day there are new medications and procedures that may have revolutionary outcomes.  It’s very difficult for any one doctor to keep up with all the latest medical breakthroughs. While your doctor wants to do the very best for your loved one, you as a patient advocate should keep your nose to the ground to sniff out new developments.  These ideas may come from a support group, friends who are also caring for a loved one, a TV program, an online community you joined, or even a newspaper or magazine you pick up at the grocery store. 

Of course, not all treatments are right for every patient; you, your loved one and the doctor will together make the choices that serve your unique circumstances.

“Are there lifestyle choices that support my loved one’s health goals?”

Make sure you ask your doctor how lifestyle choices, like diet, exercise, and maybe even social opportunities can help your loved one enjoy optimal health. Once again, be open to other sources. Always keep your eyes and ears open for ideas that have helped out others in situations similar to that of your loved one.

“Are there new products or services that can help?”  

Sometimes a simple tool like a grasping device or a new walker can make a huge difference in your loved one’s life.