By Janet Taylor, M.D., MPH

Caregiving is a thoughtful, necessary, and selfless act of kindness shared by as many as 54 million Americans.  It is also exhausting, unrelenting, sometimes mind-numbing, and can be thankless.  Caregiving is a responsibility often requiring commitment for the long haul, but it can be freighted with constant frustration and quick burnout. 

Managing the contradictions, avoiding the stress, and forestalling an early burnout is the challenge. It’s a challenge you can meet and conquer, with a little planning and a lot of support. 

Take some preventive measures, incorporate a few ongoing techniques, and you’ll be better able to sustain a positive attitude and avoid stress-related health issues too. Here are a few things that might help.

Take Time to Assess What You Need to Do

Caregiving is often an emotional response to a situation.  That’s understandable. The trick is to balance the emotional needs of ourselves and our families with the practical realities of life around us. If you have the luxury of time in weighing a caregiving decision, take it.  Sit down with family, loved ones, your spiritual advisor, your physician, or perhaps a mental health professional.  Discuss the possibilities. Share your feelings and emotions.

Be Informed

Build your own case study.  Figure out the details of how your caregiving tasks will work within your current schedule-write them down.  Visualize the alternatives and options. Then consult professionals in person or through www.strengthforcaring.com and many other fine Websites now available.  If you accept the responsibility by being well informed, prepared and comfortable, the day-to-day tasks of caregiving will seem less onerous over time.

Share the Experience

Caregiving isn’t always easy but it can be rewarding.  Share the experience with others.  Resist the urge to go it alone.  Find ways for others to help and everyone can reap the positive benefits.  Many people want to help but simply don’t know how.  Don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it.  You’ll be doubly rewarded by the response and the well-deserved rest.

Go to Sleep

You’ll hear this advice for just about all that ails you. There’s no exception here.  If you want to avoid burnout, you simply have to get some sleep.  There isn’t any choice.  You need 7-8 hours of quality REM sleep nightly to perform at your best.  Don’t skimp here.  If all else fails, attacking each day well rested can keep you focused and functioning.

Take a Break

Not an hour.  Take an afternoon; even all day. Enjoy it by yourself or with a friend.  Do something self-indulgent. Take a walk in the park; go to a movie; find a relaxing area.  Read a deliciously naughty novel.  Take a nap if you weren’t able to get your 7-8 hours of sleep the night before.  The point is to take yourself away somewhere, somehow for personal renewal. Contact local support organizations to find “respite care,” so someone can come into your home and take care of your loved one while you take some time off.

A Measured Response

The most insidious culprit in caregiver burnout is the overwhelming burden of everyday challenges.  The costs and the physical demands of care can be daunting, while the changing nature of family relationships can be frustrating and stressful. Intimacy is often neglected.  Sometimes you can even feel as though you’re losing yourself. 

Take a breath. Break down each challenge into manageable steps.  Attack them one at a time. If a problem can wait until morning, let it wait. You’ll be rested and every challenge looks different in the light of day.